Pearly Wisdom: The First Few Weeks

Welcome to the all new weekly feature Pearly Wisdom! Pearly Wisdom will post on Wednesdays and features advice from Mama’s all over the internet {Mostly from your favorite blogs!}

As a new Mom, I KNOW there’s a BIG learning curve going into this “Motherhood Business” so I thought if I could help in any small way to new mama’s or mama-to-be’s, I want to do it!

Some weeks there’ll be a TON of consensus from Mom’s and the advice will be in more of a summarized format. Other weeks (like this week!) will just have each Mom’s individual feedback & personal experiences for you to check out.

My comments will look like this :)

This has been a few weeks in the making, so without further ado…

I hope you enjoy!

Today’s Pearly Wisdom topic is:

The First Few Weeks at Home (Survival Tips!)

Cara

• Don't be afraid to ask for help! We had help that was invaluable. My mother would bring us dinner and watch the baby for a few hours so we could sleep. You'd be surprised how helpful an hour nap can be!
• Be careful of the visitors you have to entertain. If you're expected to make them coffee, then don't agree to have them over!
• Don't worry about the laundry, the dishes, or any other housework that isn't necessary to survival. It can wait!
• Be cautious with advice. "Sleep when the baby sleeps" isn't always possible to do. Don't beat yourself up if you can't do it. 9 out of 10 mothers can't either.
• Enjoy your baby. They're only that little for so long. Take pictures and lots of video to remember it! It's better to look back on it when you're not as sleep deprived.

Definitely take tons of pictures! I made sure to take one every day. The beginning (until you start to get some sleep!) can be a total blur and you’ll want them to look back on.

Samantha

The best thing I ever did was set up such a solid support system for those first few weeks that it was practically like a vacation. Between my mom living with me, and my best friend and her 12 year old daughter living with me, I really didn't have to lift a finger.

Shanna

Sam was a preemie. The first few weeks at home, I just was sure to get all of the sleep I could. He was on oxygen, so it was hard to sleep. The Rock and Play helped me most.

McKeever

To survive we made sure that we had breaks in between all the visits. I do remember us a couple of weeks after Grayson was born, telling people for one week we needed the house to ourselves. It was too hard to get on a routine otherwise. It was nice having just the three of us at nights. We didn't want our parents staying. We wanted to do it all by ourselves. We wouldn't have survived the first few weeks without these: Baby Camera Monitor & Swaddle Blanket

Melissa

Don't have too many visitors. I let the world come over and I regret it. I was trying to figure out breastfeeding, I was really hormonal and emotional, and it was just way too much. Luckily I had the sense to not let anyone sleep over. Next time it will be immediate family only, and even some of them (my MIL) were here too much. I'm definitely laying down the law next time!

If you're breastfeeding, park on the couch with your baby, watch TV or maybe a series on DVD, and nurse a lot. That's really all you will be doing for a few weeks.

If your baby is born during warmer weather, or you live somewhere that's always warm, take walks. It's nice to get out of the house for awhile and you get a little exercise.

When you're ready, join mommy and me classes and/or a mom group. I didn't really want to leave my house alone with the baby for a good 10 weeks, but when I was finally ready I joined 2 Kindermusik classes and a new mom group at the hospital I had Landon at. It's great to chat with other moms, make some friends for both you and your baby, and get out of the house. I need adult interaction since I don't work anymore, so these activities are great for both of us.

Jack was born in the late spring so as long as it wasn’t raining, I plopped him in the stroller and went for a walk every day.

Also, at about 2 months in, I joined Itsy Bitsy Yoga. It was so nice to talk to other new moms. A few of us sparked up a friendship now we have our own weekly play-dates!

Mrs. C

DO NOT SET HIGH EXPECTATIONS! Don't set them for yourself, your family, your friends and especially not for that new little baby! You can't predict what the first few weeks are going to be like. You can't even plan for it. You can have a realistic idea of what to expect but don't be surprised if everything you imagined is wrong. VERY VERY WRONG! LOL I wished I had put frozen meals in the freezer to heat up. Realistically...we lived on sandwiches and take out. I prayed that someone would bring us a home cooked meal but it only happened once!

Be prepared to be sleep deprived. As much as you want to sleep when baby is sleeping...chances are its not going to happen.

Don't focus on how messy the house is getting. YOU WILL GO CRAZY COUNTING DUST BUNNIES! You will have plenty of time to clean it when the baby turns one!

Visitors are great if they are willing to change a diaper and let you shower. However, don't feel bad about unplugging the doorbell and shutting the ringer off. People seem to forget the chaos that unfolds when you take a new baby home.

If you're feeling stressed out brush your teeth and wash your face. That sounds simple but I cant even begin to tell you how much more refreshed I felt every time I did this.

The one thing that helped me out big time was AMAZONMOM.COM. I can’t tell you how great it was to always have a constant flow of diapers, formula, and wipes!

Forget about the schedule! Every mom is in a rush to get their baby on a schedule. Don't drive yourself insane trying to do this. Instead let the baby make his/her own schedule. Relax and enjoy motherhood!

Take tons of pictures! You won't regret it! This is a scary/sarcastic post I wrote a couple weeks into motherhood but it was the only way to express how I felt: LINK

Emily

-LET OTHERS HELP YOU! I wanted to do it all…to be super mom and it just DID NOT WORK!

-Relax and take it one day at a time. This baby is brand new to the world and you’re a brand new mom. Pick your battles!

-When the baby sleeps you sleep too! I never did this and regret it!

-Eat! Eat! Eat! Even if you don’t feel hungry. You need 500 extra calories a day to keep up with breastfeeding and not to mention it’s good for your health, recovery, and your energy levels…don’t forget to drink plenty of water too!

Sara

- If you're attempting to breastfeed I strongly recommend hydrogel pads to help with nipple discomfort. I used Mothermates - but I understand Ameda offers something similar. Keep them in the refrigerator to provide that extra bit of cool relief.

- It might be a good idea to rent, borrow or buy an electric breast pump for the glorious period known as engorgement. I also suggest stocking up on green leaf cabbage which helps calm the swelling. Again keep it in the crisper and your tender breasts will thank you.

Shelley

- Don't be afraid to ask for help

- Sleep when the baby sleeps

- Don't worry about household chores! You will get around to it when you have time.

- Keep in mind that the first few weeks are the hardest and it will get easier!

- Soak it all up. They grow so quickly!

Andrea

• accept help
• don’t "plan" on anything or have any expectations of what baby needs/how they will act
• have "thank you" cards ready

Yes! I can’t stress the “thank you” cards enough. I kept a pack of 50 along with plenty of stamps right in the kitchen!

Becky
-Family help, get lots of it.
-Schedule. Get on one, and get on one early. Although baby will
fluctuate, and things will change, try to stick to a schedule as much
as possible
-iPhone apps that help you log all the essentials, i.e. poopy diapers,
feed times, feed frequency, etc.
-Ask questions. Ask other moms. Find moms that can relate to you. Buddy up!
-Sleep when baby sleeps. This is a MUST!
-Take tons of pictures... they grow up too fast.

The iPhone app I lived by at the beginning (and still use now) is called Baby Connect. Totally worth it!

Erika

These were definitely the hardest and most amazing filled weeks. Things that truly made it easy for us included – having my husband at home, having Savannah sleep in her pack in play in the room, pre-made meals, nipple cream, the 90 minute sleep program book, swaddle, and most importantly we made sure to get out of the house at least once a day.

Katie

Oh girls. To do just that. SURVIVE. Just know, it won’t be like this forever. It DOES get better. The first, I’d say 2, months, are hard. HARD. And no one tells you that at the cutesy showers when you’re holding up darling tiny clothes that you will ONLY put on them to take pictures to post on facebook. They will then quickly be pulled off to be replaced by gowns or feetie jammies because, let’s face it, if you’re a normal mom you’re …

#1 – so enraptured by the love you feel for this tiny, helpless, creature that is the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen that,

#2 – you’re TERRIFIED to take him/her anywhere for fear of colds, the flu, RSV … the plague. Pretty much anything that could somehow FLING itself upon your unsuspecting newborn and cause them harm and therefore …

There is no need to dress them up in an adorable outfit when they’ll just produce a blowout diaper that you will have to replace said adorable outfit WITH … feetie jammies. So survival tip? Take one day at a time, ASK FOR HELP if you’re experiencing any post-baby crazy and, ENJOY this sweet time. Because soon they will be running everywhere, too busy to snuggle and you’ll think to yourself “What did I DO with all that time they were just laying there sleeping!?!?” Oh and buy some newborn clothes. Most babies don’t come home fitting in 0-3 mo. clothes. My munchkin wore them for at least the first 3 weeks. And (even if you have a boy and think they’re ridiculous) GOWNS. ARE. AWESOME. They lift right up, you can change the diaper and pull it right back down. Quick. Easy access. No screaming. Greatness. We loved them.

Thank you to this week’s contributors!

Cara, Mama to Amelia (Millie), 1 year

Samantha, Mama to Xavier, 6 months, Author of Three Beasts One Baby

Shanna, Mama to Samuel, 1 year (corrected age: 8 months), Author of The Life and Times of Lubey

McKeever, Mama to Grayson, 10 Months, Author of The Cobia Family

Melissa, Mama to Landon, 7 Months, Author of Love, Marriage, and a Baby Carriage!

Mrs. C, Mama to Evan, 1 year, Author of The Other Side of the Story

Emily, Mama to Georgia, 8 months, Author of Live a Charmed Life

Sara, Mama to Saige, 3 years & Gabe, 3 months, Author of Saige Wisdom

Shelley, Mama to Emily, 4 months, Author of Life Hand in Hand

Andrea, Mama to Avrie, 7 months, Author of Keeping Up With the Sonneks

Becky, Mama to Elliana, 14 months, Author of From Mrs. To Mama

Erika, Mama to Savannah, 6 months, Author of The Frieze’s Little Bean

Katie, Mama to Caleb, 15 months, Author of Life in the Fulmer Lane

If you’d like to be a contributor on an upcoming topic, please email me:

agirlinpearls@gmail.com